What do I do?
How do I feel?
How do I respond?
Is this the right thing for me?
Is it?

No matter how much I hard I try to run away I feel like gravity keeps pulling me back... do I succumb to gravity or do I try to defy it? What do I truly want and what is best for me- these are the two questions that I honestly need to answer, and soon. Very, very soon. I just don't have the answers.

This is my Christmas wish: to understand.